I have not blogged in years and sworn off airing my deep emotions on the internet, but then a pandemic hit and I find myself isolated, scared and turning to the only way I know how to really process dark times – the written word.
This blog was started YEARS ago to keep my family updated on the adventures young Bird (my husband) and Belle (me) were having in marriage. Now it will pick back up, about 10 years later, with our adventures in trying to survive a pandemic.
That word gives me chills.
Definition: An outbreak of a disease that occurs over a wide geographic area and affects an exceptionally high proportion of the population.
Today is March 19, 2020, day 4 of Social Isolation for my family, which now includes a 1st grader we lovingly call “Bean,” an old crabby cat named Fermi, and a young zoomy cat named Newman. Together we are learning to live in a new and terrifying reality as the novel CoVid-19 virus spreads across the globe. Modeling disease outbreaks is incredibly hard, but from what I can tell, by the time this outbreak is under control millions will have died.
My emotions shift wildly throughout the day. One minute I feel grounded, together and ready to tackle this and the next I am fighting off tears. School is canceled for the foreseeable future leaving me scrambling to figure out how to homeschool our daughter. The gym where I had just started working is closed. Bird is working his two jobs from our tiny upstairs attic room.
We don’t leave our neighborhood unless it is for food or medical reason. We don’t have playdates with other kids. We don’t have mom’s nights out. My card group no longer plays. We cook basic food with very basic pantry staples. We take our temperatures daily to monitor for illness. We obsessively sterilize all surfaces each day. We work in the garden sowing seeds in hopes of fresh produce in the coming months. I look to my plants for inspiration, hope, and joy.